Thursday, December 27, 2007
I'm really not in the blogging mood but still thought coming in to drop some contents.
The past days I'm totally immersed in depression, till now I'm not sure if I've break free from the terrible feeling.
I would say it's fear that led to the inferiority, then depression.
At one point time I possessed the thought of giving up, perhaps adopting the heck-care attitude might help.
The condition can deteriorates all it wants, by all means k...
Anyway I was never good in any sense.
Finally I think it's time to stop wallowing in self-pity, shut-up and carry on with life~
Hope I've got all the faith to move on!
- My Prerogative
4:55 AM
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
I thought I've got over it...
I thought I've succeeded in putting it behind me..
When I thought I've made it this time...
CAN THE MEDIA STOP REPORTING NEWS OF JAYCHOU CONCERT!!??!?!
You know I'm really crazy/freaked out/bananas about the performance and I can't even get to smell the tickets?!?!?
And the news reportings start pouring in like mad when I've stopped my naggings.
"Thanks, I appreciate it ok"
^^%^#^#$><@#*&%$@
- My Prerogative
5:20 AM
Monday, December 24, 2007
Merry Christmas to my dear friends!
Enjoy yourselves this joyous feative season!
Graphics from Sanriotown
- My Prerogative
6:25 PM
Sunday, December 23, 2007
seafood feast
my tam jiak de mama
the sea after rain
i miss a&w !
tian & ying
Turi Beach
ying & jia
mummy & tian
tian & jia
sistas
A big 'THANK YOU' to aunty Lucy - the accomodation, food and shopping arrangement.
- My Prerogative
12:30 AM
Saturday, December 22, 2007
I'm so freaking jealous/green/envious/desirious!
Kill me cans?!?!?!
Why are the two of us living lives that are 2 million worlds apart!
From today onwards, she'll be my role model; source of motivation!
I wanna be like her one day!!
- My Prerogative
9:36 PM
[ They call it the 'Quarter-life Crisis.'
It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like.
You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.
You start realizing that people are selfish and that,maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones.
What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.
You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.
Your opinions have gotten stronger.
You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't.
One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.
You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life.
You feel alone and scared and confused.
Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.
You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you.
Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better.
Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you are doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person.
One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap.
Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic.
You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision.
You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself... and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender! ]
Thoughts for the moment: This is only my 3rd month in my twenties and I found the above article relating soo well to the current me. Is there anything I can do to help myself ?
- My Prerogative
3:08 AM
Friday, December 21, 2007
Happy Birthday Nicola!
The birthday girl
yay!
- My Prerogative
2:04 AM
Thursday, December 20, 2007
If I will be paid 50 bucks for each time I yawn today, I guess I dont have to work for the entire January of year 2008.
At this point of time, I'm at the verge of dying from fatigue and hunger; especially after 2.5hrs of dry and boring Productivity Management (PM) lesson..
Yes, you can help by killing me~
I would really appreciate if someone out there can enlighten me on how am I going to survive through this module. lol
Anyway, earlier on when I was on my way home, I think I saw 'him'.
Was it him? Or did my eyes play tricks on me ?
But the body build, the bicycle, the cap?!?!
Whatever la, even it is we failed to recognise each other..
Well, tommorrow is a public holiday!
Woohoo!
My dear friends out there who are severely deprived of sleep .. beauty-sleep all you want k!
I'm soo in lurve with public holidays cans!!
- My Prerogative
1:34 AM
Monday, December 17, 2007
I shall now officially declare myself impoverished!
Pls remind me to keep my cool if anyone pissed me off at work cos I really need to stay put till at least 31 Dec for the wages, laggi best Apr'08 if there will be bonus payout, if not forget it~
The past weekend was about christmas shoppin' - tired yet fruitful
( What's wrong with me ah? Is age catching up or what? I think the word 'tired'has topped my statisical complain chart for the past 3 month!)
Ya, anyway I rewarded myself with losta pressies!
Hmm.. one of the reasons to reward myself would be "Yay, this is my 4th month in the company! I haven quit!!"
hahahaha, k la, I know this really sounds spastic but who cares, this is what we call retail therapy~
If my shopping companions haven't stopped me in time, my pocket would be hemorrhaging like I don't know what ~
Someone was supposed to meet me for dinner that evening; but eventually backed out cos' of star awards!
That person hor.. really want to box her ah* lol
Keke, back to it, our department had our December welfare cum X'mas gift exchange @ New York New York.
I choco-fied sinfully and loaded myself with uncountable calories ~
'hooray'!
Overall, the gathering was merry, an outcome that goes well with this festive season!
I hope this feeling of goodness can stay in me for as long as it can.
I want be blessed!
Santa, I wanna bid grumpy me goodbye this christmas!
- My Prerogative
1:46 AM
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Just wondering how do other people communicate with their peers?
Do they talk politely or will they bicker?
Well, for me I usually interact in the form of bickering; of cos that limits to only people whom I think is close to that extent la..
Cos life is already in sucha misery state so we shouldnt be too serious~
Just take things as it is and live by everyday~
Think I'm too drained; don't even know that I'm want to express..
Anyway, dreadful monday on its way~
It's time to keep myself replenish with adequate rest!
- My Prerogative
1:34 AM
Friday, December 14, 2007
Just managed to survive through my 2nd 'Organisation Behavior (OB)' lesson.
Working in the day and having lessons at night is super taxing~
I hope I've all the perserverance to hang on man~
Luckily the trainer possess a great sense of humour to brighten the dry contents of the lesson~ YES PLS! talk cork to someone who loves to talk cork! she'll buy all your idea! muahahaha
Oh ya, OB covers content like psychology ( classical & operant conditionings & social learning theory) my psychology kharkis, does it ring a bell ? lolx!
Anyway,I've thought over it -
Hmm... since I've outgrown the age where my mom would buy me barbie dolls if I score 80 and above for subjects..
I shall reward myself with a Guess watch if I pass my exam for OB which is to be held at end Febuary~
Lol, I hereby forsee 2 possibilities
One, pass the exam and become penniless
Two, fail the exam yet buy the watch and then ended up penniless
!!!
slap slap slap
li yi tian, pls wake up!!
Again, we've come to the end of another week.
Though our company does not have the friday dress-down day policy.. My stress level tend to decelerate on a Friday like this one, especially when the red chair is not occupied~
opps. lol
Anyway, I love weekends! I look forward to weekends and I treasure weekends!
woohoo~
This weekend, my dear friend buyii is going for the D&D which she has nagged at the entire week
well well, hope things turn out great for her, enjoy pal!
- My Prerogative
1:30 AM
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
I'm officially back to blogging life!
I think I should really start readopting the idea of bloggin since my superior graded me a '6' for communication skills.
wahaha
(sorry to have disappoint my CSAS teacher!)
Nah, actually the main reason was I think I deserved a place to shelter my emotions lah.
Some place in which I can rant all I want.
Hmm, this is the least I can do for myself bah.
I've been feeling kinda bad these days, as if the whole world owes me something,
I'm always engaged in the 'depressed and frustrated' mood. Is this known as PMS?
But I can't be having PMS mood the entire month right?
Something is not right somewhere lah, just that I don't know what it is.
To people whom I've lost contact with and people whom I have not been meeting up since I don't know when, rest assured I'm still alive and kicking!
lol. Work has took up most of my time~
Though I very much wished to say that I'm enjoying what I'm doing everyday, but however there's still a significant distance to that.
Sad to say, working brings wealth; however it also brought us to see the cruelty of the working world.
Lots of hidden emotions, thoughts and motives..
So helpless but the only survival tip~
Anyway, I think I'll still gotta be in this state for 40 more years
(exceptions will be if I strike toto group 1 or I die earlier than expected, lol)
so I shall start accepting life the way it is~
My part-time studies gonna commence tommorrow~
Hmm.. something to look forward to; cos it's like haven touch books and lecture notes for 8 months?!??!
Wonder how it feels to be a student again?!??!
I hope I've got the discipline installed in me to sail through the course of study smoothly~
I dont wannna get stranded in land of regret like what I did 3 years ago.. (wasted 3 years and 6000SGD +++ for a piece of relatively useless A3 size paper)
Most importantly I dont wanna fail people who supported me and satisfy people awaiting to see me fall~
- My Prerogative
1:28 AM
